Finally able to meet my older daughter!

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I'm not sure if this is the right place to post my personal news in my ongoing divorce case here in Japan, but at last I have been granted permission to take my older daughter out during my visitation on Sundays. Or perhaps, my older daughter has decided to forego what her mother has being telling her about me, and meet me on Sunday afternoons. Whichever the reason, at last - I've been able to visit with both of my daughters for three hours every Sunday. I had the first lunch with BOTH of my kids for the first time since around October 2002. It's still not enough - but it's much better than not being able to see them at all.

My wife's lawyer has actually been rather supportive of my visitation rights since last spring. However, on the flip side of the coin, he has used my older daughter as a kind of lure to try and get me to come back and live with my wife. He is also aware that I have no plans to go back and live with my wife, not after seven years of trouble, abuse, and marital strife. I've already began to discuss some of the troubles we've had on my own site, and there is much more to tell.

In any case, my own divorce case is still in family court, but it will probably move on to district court in a matter of a few months, and divorce litigation will commence. I hired a lawyer at last this week - to the tune of 315,000 yen up front. Ouch. But it was a necessary step.

I'm unsure whether they will continue to let me see my daughters every week like I am now. But as long as I can, I plan to meet the kids whenever possible.

I used to be afraid of troubling my wife's lawyer about letting me see the kids, since he has been present every time I go pick up the kids and then when I bring them back. But the more I meet the kids, the more I realize their feelings too. They love their father and want to be with him - me. I don't say that because I want to put myself on some high and lofty pedestal and prove how important I am. I just want to say, children that are loved by their parents deserve to be with them. The ongoing theme of this site, no doubt.

- Jeff

Edited 26/01/2005 08:22:07
Posted By:
Andrew (51 posts)
3/19/2004 10:05:57 PM
re: Finally able to meet my olde...   profile
That's FANTASTIC news Jeff! To see your daughter 3 hours a week is a world away from not seeing her at all. You can be a father to her much more than never seeing her - if she has any problems, you have the chance to hear her and maybe help her (even if it's just moral support) - it will also mean a big deal to her too.

I just want to say, children that are loved by their parents deserve to be with them.

Yes - absolutely. No-one can deny the reality of the parent/child relationship. We have seen many social engineering disasters and are currently living through one - but our biology does not change. Kids need parents and parents needs kids - it's simple - there's not much to say on it really (!) - I just wish people would realise this simple truth and work out a pragmatic solution to each separated family. Why this need to hide behind culture that denies our bilogical needs? Biology runs deeper than culture.

Anyway, keep us posted on events Jeff......!

FRIJ recommends you also visit crn japan, who are fighting international abduction to Japan and working to assure children in Japan of meaningful contact with both parents regardless of marital status