Advice needed on divorce settlement in Japan

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Hello, For the last month I have been struggling through law books and web sites in Japanese to see what the story is about settlement payment in a divorce. As you know in the west the husband and wife split the savings and fix assets 50%/50%. But my Japanese wife and her parents say that this is not the case in Japan. I have read on other websites that the men commonly hand over between 2 - 3 million yen. This is fine with me as it is about half of our savings that we accumulated over the years we were living togther. But what I don't like is that the wife doesn't hand over half her earnings that she earned during the marriage from her job. My wife and parents are saying thay if you don't pay all of this amount (3 million yen) then they want money back from the wedding that they paid mostly for and the expenses for the time I was staying there before I we got married. But I don't think this is legally possible.
if she doesn't half things fairly I don't feel obliged to pay child support.

Can anyone shine some light on this topic?

Thanks in advance
Posted By:
Andrew (51 posts)
9/23/2004 3:58:02 PM
re: Advice needed on divorce set...   profile
Hi Deane,

Where will you be living from now on? Are you near your children? Have you arranged a visitation schedule for yourself to see your children? I ask these questions, because sometimes you sadly need to use child maintainance as a bartering chip to make sure you can see your kids. I pay maintainance for my son, and in return I am now (at last) getting some news and photos of him (my next step is to organize a visitation schedule).

I honestly don't know the law regarding dividing up assets however. My own wife and I came to a quick, simple arrangement regarding this, so I didn't need to read up on the laws.

Regarding child maintainance, as far as I know, there are no laws to force you to pay for it anyway. If this were the case, we would have some leverage with trying to enforce visitation arangements (though admittedly that doesn't seem to work in the legal courts of western countries).

Sorry I can't answer all of your concerns.....keep in touch....

Edited 23/09/2004 15:58:56
japchap (48 posts)
9/24/2004 2:22:57 AM
re: Advice needed on divorce set...   profile
Deane, you're in a tough spot. Japanese people can be
mean as hell when it comes to money... even the same
people that may have been kind to you previously for years.
Have you ever watched "The Judge" on TV?
You'll learn a lot about what wicked things some Japanese
people can do when it comes to money, and how evil they can

They're asking you to pay wedding expenses?
What kind of agreement was there at the time of the wedding?
Written contracts do carry weight in Japan. However, if you
specifically expressed that you would pay them back for
wedding expenses and so on, you may have some hard times
trying to grapple with them on this issue.

Bottom line - we're not lawyers, and nobody I know who has
posted on this board has legal expertise. You're playing with
fire, and your wife and her family are going to ream you up the ass.
They will have no heart and no reason when it comes to this,
and they will mercilessly clean you out if they get the chance.
Don't let them. Cut off your communications with them
now regarding finances, and hire a lawyer. It may save you a
lot of trouble and expense in the end. Your efforts to search for
legal information is admirable, and it may help you. But the
bottom line is, if you are planning on divorcing or have divorced
your Japanese wife, you are NO LONGER FAMILY. You will be
exorcised and cleaned out. Don't try to wage the financial battle
all by yourself. I tried to do that for almost a year, and I lost a little
more money than I should have. Once I searched diligtenly for and
hired a competent lawyer, I realized that my wife could not legally
get away with what she was asking for. It was a comfort to know
that someone was one my side, at least regarding money.

- Jeff

Edited 24/09/2004 02:25:11
fidelis ehiemua (2 posts)
2/7/2010 3:41:42 AM
re: Advice needed on divorce set...   profile
please advice me on what to do; my japanese wife want to divorce me , and i dont want to divorce.
angela123holmes (3 posts)
2/15/2010 12:30:25 PM
re: Advice needed on divorce set...   profile
l am not a lawyer ,but my japenese daughter went beack,taking the two girls with her,after 2 years apart they can divorce you like it or not. as she did to my son.they were married in the uk,so he doesnt know if he is legally dvorced here in the uk,but in japan her divorce is legal,my son got a letter demanding multi millions of yen.but he contacted her and told her only if he could see the girls.would he pay.we have never heard another word about money or the girls,its been nearly six years now.japense are cruel and evil people.they care about no one exept themselves.

FRIJ recommends you also visit crn japan, who are fighting international abduction to Japan and working to assure children in Japan of meaningful contact with both parents regardless of marital status