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I am french and my wife is Japanese, we live in UK. Our marriage is a total failure. I have kept it going for 4 years but it has been extremely hard work on my part.

We have a son and reading the abduction stories on this webiste really scare me. It seems that although most of you have had court orders the Japanese system is totally disregarding those....

What to do?

Posted By:
Andrew (51 posts)
10/9/2005 8:25:34 PM
re: Scared   profile
Does your son have a passport? If so, I'd make sure you have possession of it, or keep it where your wife cannot get to it.

I found this information on the web, specifically related to child abduction from the UK:-

Foreign & Commonwealth Office Child Abduction Information


If your child has been abducted or you fear that an attempt may be made to abduct you should contact the Child Abduction Section immediately on 020 7008 0878 to be put in touch with a caseworker.

We also work closely with the charity 'Reunite', the leading UK charity on international parental child abduction. Reunite provides advice and support to parents and guardians who have had a child abducted or fear abduction. They can be contacted on +44 (0) 116 2556 234.

The Child Abduction Section has published a leaflet offering guidance on what to do and who to contact if your child is taken overseas against your wishes or if you are worried that your child might be abducted overseas.

Good luck.....let us know how you get on!

Edited 09/10/2005 20:26:11
Alison (5 posts)
11/18/2005 2:12:55 PM
re: Scared   profile
If you do get a divorce in the UK ask for a full residence order and a prohibited steps order. This means you will have custody of your son and if he is kidnapped all UK port authorities will be alerted. As will all EU port authorities if you are outside the country at the time! However, you will only be able to leave the UK for up to a maximum 28 days at a time with your son.
ekalmus (7 posts)
12/4/2005 6:14:57 AM
re: Scared   profile
I am fighting this now in Los Angeles. Court orders do no good for a japanese woman who wants out. If a japanese person got into a japanese airline (JAL etc.) with your child and they made internaitional space you would have a hard time.

I lost a daugther to Japan in 1998 - and am doing everything possible so it doesnt happen again with a different wife. I have done a great deal of research and the best bet is to cancel the passport, contact local authorities, and be smart. You might toconsider having your ex watched by a private investigator (could be expensive, but a good option).

I am not up on the laws in the UK, but DO AS MUCH RESEARCH as you can. Know what you should be watching so you are not another victim.

Good Luck -

duped (1 posts)
3/17/2006 8:42:55 PM
re: Scared   profile
This is a very late answer so maybe you won't see it (in time...).
I was similar to you, scared, reading these sites, but not acting,
until one day my wife escaped with our 2 kids... Stealing the passports
is good but only a short term solution because she can ask new Japanese
passports without your help (I did it but she still escaped). However if
you can guess when she *finds out* about the missing passports, that's
a good hint she's preparing the trip. Look for other clues like getting her
affairs into order or suddenly becoming more friendly. If your son can speak he can give you valuable hints too (for a period of time when we were going somewhere my daughter would ask "are we going to Japan?" ; then my wife must have realised her mistake and she stopped it).
Unfortunately, as someone mentioned, there is virtually no way to stop
a Japanese citizen who wants to get out of the country.

I would also get on very good terms with her family if it's not already the case.
In my case it made a very big difference to being able to see my kids.

FRIJ recommends you also visit crn japan, who are fighting international abduction to Japan and working to assure children in Japan of meaningful contact with both parents regardless of marital status